Tips for Surviving the Upcoming Mayan Apocalypse


 
 11 Dec 2012   Funny, Video, Youtube

John Hodgman has some handy tips for you, since the end of the world is nigh.

Fortunately, I will be fully stocked on the 21st, as I will also be having a Christmas/End of the World party. You’re all invited. I have a futon and I know at least 4 of you could fit on that. Also, I have beer.

 

via sis

 



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  • Conspiracy Einstein

    I was under the impression thnkrtv made videos based on true events. This … changes things.

  • TruuuV

    Is anyone else intrigued as to how much rioting and the like will go down on the 21st?

    I mean we know there are people that believe it’s the end of the world and we know there are millions of dumbfucks world wide so what’s to say it won’t just be a planet wide looting spree?

    • Conspiracy Einstein

      I will be trashing everything.

      • TruuuV

        Just screaming “THE APOCALYPSE!” every few broken windows to make sure no one thinks you’re being pointlessly violent.

        • Conspiracy Einstein

          I wonder if that will be a defense in the days following.

          “But … the apocalypse.”

          I also wonder how many people will try to sue the Mayans.

          • TruuuV

            “How was I supposed to know that a civilisation that effectively poisoned themselves by putting the bodies of their deceased into the rivers and polluting their own water supply wouldn’t be omnipotent beings that were able to accurately estimate the exact day the world was going to end?

            I mean it’s not like scientists openly confronted those conspiracies and the primary fallacy, you know, the fact the Mayan calendar at no point claimed that it was the end of existence but rather a new calendar beginning.

            …. Wait they did? When? Oh… Shit.”

            • Conspiracy Einstein

              ::breaks window::

              APOCALYYPPPSSSEEE!!

            • Benny the Icepick

              The Mayans were morons. Off by a good ten days. My Dilbert calendar accurately predicts the end to be the 31st.

              • Conspiracy Einstein

                Ten more days of living it up!

          • Blinghamstar

            Please scream it in a semi-incoherent way, like, “DERPOCKAHLIS!” Please.

    • ohplease

      Well last year with the Camping false alarm. No riots happened. As far as I know, no suicides happened either. It was a pretty uneventful apocalypse. Let’s change that this year.

      • TruuuV

        Thing is, the rapture was “all the good christians get to heaven” so you wouldn’t expect the riots until people rose into the sky.

        This is more “The world ends today, we can’t riot when it starts ending because we’ll be too busy dying” so who knows.

        • Blinghamstar

          Joke is on the Christians… turns out the Rapture did occur, and only 38 of them world-wide got raptured. None of them had much worldly possessions; it’s certainly not enough to make the news when a few humble poor people disappear…

  • ohplease

    “I make a lot of urine” Don’t we all, don’t we all.

    Well I for one am looking forward to the end of the world. I’m a little curious to see what it’s going to be like. Please let my death be swift and painless

    • TruuuV

      Pfft, we all know the dogs are getting you.

  • Slartibartfatsdomino

    Beer????

    *books bus ticket to Seattle*

    • dailyoftheday

      AND WHISKEY.

      -N

      • Blinghamstar

        Now I’m in.

  • ilovellamas

    There’s a country-wide protest/demonstration occurring on the 21st. This will be the third (and largest) protest this month, and the last two were infiltrated by neo-nazis… tear gas, cobblestone hurled at people’s heads, and water cannon (not water cannons, mind you, because Slovenia only has one – well prepared!) were involved. I’m pretty sure I’m not gonna live to see the 22nd regardless :P

    Just noticed Truuv’s comment about rioting… I expect this city to be in full-riot mode on the 21st, with the combination of these two events. I’m honestly more scared than I probably need to be.