Recess


 
 01 Feb 2013   Recess

Baby owl with cracker on head

 



About The Author


Nona and Kylie are butt-kicking web mods who are dedicated to curating the finest internet content.

  • SumAnon

    Is that a very small owl or a very big cracker???

    • MynameisBlarney

      Yes.

    • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Kabwla Two-Lips

      Undoubtedly.

  • Bling-Nye, the Daft Punk guy

    I want to say the following…

    A. I want a baby owl.

    B. Firefly is the shit. Who wouldn’t want to bring it back??

    C. MAXIMUMORGASSSMMM!!!!

    4. ???

    5. PROFIT

    6. Mayan apocalypse… lawlz

  • https://twitter.com/knowyouronion Pascal

    1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 banged students. Ha. Ha. Ha

  • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Kabwla Two-Lips

    How do you sand an anthem?

  • MynameisBlarney

    Do not toy with me about Firefly.
    Just…don’t.

  • Bling-Nye, the Daft Punk guy

    So that owlette sez to me, “I am cracker-hat Confucius, ask me for wisdoms!”

    So I sez, “Ur wisdoms, give them to me.”

    So it sez, “Man who stand on toilet, high on the pot.” And it giggled.

    So I sez, “Ur so dumb.” Lawlz.

    So it sez, “I’m an owlette with a cracker-hat, your argument is invalid.”

    So we burned another one down and watched Empire of the Sun music videos together.

    Oh cracker-hat owlette, you so silly.

  • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Lascivious Lass

    Besides the fact that I’m no stranger to other women disparaging my sexual nature, it’s articles like the University of Minnesota one that remind me I am definitely different than a fair amount of other women. It’s difficult for me to fathom not having multiples without much effort. I greatly wish more women could experience the same joy I get from sex, and I hope people continue to seek out ways to increase the physical, emotional, and mental enjoyment they experience during sexual intimacy and exploration.

    • Bling-Nye, the Daft Punk guy

      Amen.

    • ExecutorElassus

      I kinda wish the link weren’t to some site that looks like a front for a conservative organization (note the subtle surprise that students under 21 might actually [gasp!] attend something about hoo-hahs), but good lord, I wish there were more stuff like this.
      GENTLEMEN (or, you know, LADIES WHO ARE INTO LADIES): learn how to bring your partner to orgasm! Then do it a lot! That way lies enlightenment!

      • Bling-Nye, the Daft Punk guy

        ‘ALLELOOYUH!!

      • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Lascivious Lass

        PREACH IT, BROTHER!

        • ExecutorElassus

          Wait, are we testifying now? All right, I’ll give it a shot. Uh …

          Brothers and sisters! Discover the G-Spot! Venerate the clitoris! Experiment with butt-sex! I may have wandered, like you, long in ignorance and darkness, but I too! came unto the promised land! I may have suffered the iniquities and humiliation of my partner’s disdain, of the slightly downturned lips that whispered, so, like, you’re done?, but I too! did learn the errors of my ways, and did better myself, and discover the power and the glory of her majesty’s dainty flower! Yes, I too was but a shadow of my true self, fearful of the mysteries of lady parts, anxious of their idiosyncracies, but I was led to the the warm sunlight and cool dew of multiple positions! Of versatile and flexible lovemaking! Of stimulating ALL THE THINGS. Yes, I too! did finally find my way to the exhausted, slurred mumble of that thing you did, just now, are you some kind of sex wizard? I think I have to fall asleep now. Brothers and sisters, if a wretched ignoramus such as myself can find the way to this Valley of Sin and Delight, and bask in its warm glow and vaguely humid air, then you too!, brothers and sisters, you too can find your way!

          • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Lascivious Lass

            http://youtu.be/B_fL5jozGac

            p.s. – Love the, “I think I have to fall asleep now,” part because I look like this female lion when totally satisfied.

      • ilovellamas

        Ladies who are into ladies are generally pretty damn good at that ;)

      • ilovellamas

        And regarding the page it links to, you’re absolutely right and you just killed my alumna pride :( From their “about” section: CampusReform.org is designed to provide conservative activists with the resources, networking capabilities, and skills they need to revolutionize the struggle against leftist bias and abuse on college campuses.

        The site name and design reminds me too much of a site that existed when I was in school, http://www.everystudent.com, which was a total mask to get students to visit, but was a christian movement to spread throughout campus.

        I googled “campus reform” and found these:
        http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/27/schools-conservative-shou_n_801326.html#s214774&title=George_Washington_University
        http://redalertpolitics.com/2012/12/19/campus-reform-targets-liberal-universities-in-2012-challenge/

        *depressed*

    • Logan

      I’m not one for multiples, but women just need to teach men where the G spot is. I managed to teach almost everyone I dated (and if they weren’t interested in learning, we didn’t date long).

      • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Lascivious Lass

        Yuuup! And that’s really the important aspect here: people willing to teach and listen to each other.

  • ExecutorElassus

    Owlet with a cracker hat spends all day thinking to him/herself “I swear to god, I will fucking cut you.

    PS, sometimes the absurdist comedy of DotD’s commentariat really makes my day. I love you guys.

    • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Lascivious Lass

      I feel my top commenter position allows me to extend a big, “WE LOVE YOU TOO,” on behalf of the other commenters.

      • Bling-Nye, the Daft Punk guy

        Where are those rankings? Or are you just laying claim?

        • http://dailyoftheday.com/ Lascivious Lass

          The “community” button next to discussion, and nah – I’m a little embarrassed I comment so much. But again, picture me as Johnny 5 viewing this site/reading comments: INPUUUUUUT!!!!

  • ilovellamas

    “The University of Minnesota is planning an event to help all of its female students learn how to achieve maximum orgasm.” So much <3333 for my alma mater.

  • JeremiahCatclaw

    So did she bang seven students or 144? I’m confused…